Friday, October 28, 2011

I Heart My Body.

After I had a baby, I felt the ugliest I've ever been.

Isn't that strange? And sort of sad? 

I'd done something so amazing, so miraculous, and yet I felt mangled and frazzled and dumpy. My husband would leave for work in the morning, kissing the pale, freckly face of a frizzy-haired, sleep-chasing, confused new mum.

I was always wearing wrinkled pajamas with only one button done up, in the interests of quieting a hungry baby quickly at all hours of the night. No cute shorts or sexy lingerie.

My hair, which usually needs at least some attention each day lest I look like the bus driver from South Park with birds and leaves sticking out of it, was wild and wooly and everywhere.

I mourned the loss of whatever was in my boobs that made them not look like deflated balloons.

I mourned the once-smooth and stretch-mark-free skin of my stomach.

Now, seven months later, I've found the ability to play up what's cute, and hide what's still sorting itself out, post-birth.

Nobody told me that all the muscles in my thighs and butt would lose all tone.

Nobody told me that stitches in your nether regions are freaky and stuff takes a while to get back to a new normal.


I know I'm still too skinny. I know that my stomach skin will never be the same, and it will sort of still look like a front bum for a while yet. I know that it's weird I have dark spots in my belly button from when my stomach got a tan in the last few months of pregnancy.



I know that my thighs are wobbly and I'm conscious of them squishing and squelching and looking lumpy when I sit down in shorts. And how just above my knee is a little loose halo of flab.

But I also know that I have the power to work on them and get them back to a reasonable amount of tone.

Same with my butt.

Same with my tuckshop lady arms.

I know, too, that I don't have to if I don't want to. Or I can do it when I'm ready. It's only been seven months.

I also know that my mirror looks dirty, but I assure you it's not. It's just old :)

I love my body for what it's done, what it's yet to do and what it does every day.

I love that it's mine and I can do what I like with it.

Today I'm linking up with Carly at We Heart Life for I Heart My Body 2011.

Tomorrow is the day to show your stuff and be proud of your body, in whatever package it comes in.

Take a photo of yourself - whatever you're comfortable with. Put it on your blog.

Share your story about your body image issues - but share what you love, too.

Go and link up tomorrow, Saturday October 29. Support all the other bodies putting their skin and their soul out there in blogland, to help remind us all that we're beautiful.

We only get one body. We have to learn to love it.


Photobucket

112 comments:

  1. I'd love to see a blog post from your husband about what he loves about your body...I bet he couldn't fault it.
    Even before babies we all have our faults and things we don't like but it's about owning them and loving what we do have and making the most of it.

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  2. This is a wonderful post... we are our own worst critics when in comes to our bodies. Taking the 'before' photos is the most horrible thing ever, but looking at yourself as you have above can be very rewarding also - you can focus on all the good parts of your body, not just the things that are not quite as you would like them just yet.
    Your body did an beautiful thing growing your Veggie Baby, so focus on that!
    I love this "I Heart My Body" initiative, I will see if I have the guts to be involved.... (not in my undies that is for sure!)

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  3. Cherie @ a baby called MaxOctober 28, 2011 10:26 AM

    You're amazing! Absolute to-die-for body! Holy mother of god.

    Embrace, & be proud of beautiful you, who mothered that beautiful veggie baby of yours!

    xx

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  4. yes! making the most of the good bits, and working on the not-so-good bits, exactly. I have to remember that having a baby is a momentous change, and stuff is going to take a while. And that's ok <3

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  5. Thank you, it is a great reality check. You should totally do it, the key is honesty, not undies! <3

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  6. It's so true... she makes everything worth it. 

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  7. So brave to post this! And although I (and I daresay a few others) would probably look at your pictures and think what an incredible body it is - the comfort-o-meter for yourself is very different and you see every little thing that's changed where everyone just sees a smoking hot mama.

    Even after losing about 8kgs so far in my quest for pre-baby body, I've still got 20kgs to go and I don't think I'd be brave enough to take a photo of it. You are the awesome, definitely.

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  8. oh thank you - yes I do realise I'm pretty lucky, but we all have our issues and concerns, especially after a baby. I ummed and ahhed about doing this, and still don't know if it was the right decision, but I have to remember we're all beautiful in our own way. Such momentous change...

    I think 8kgs is spectacular and even if you have a ways to go, as you say, it's an impressive effort that demands respect in itself! You know I think you're beautiful x

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  9. Beautiful, honest post. And, you look amazing - you should see MY body post baby! You may not be the same as you were pre veggie baby but you're in amazing shape all the same x

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  10. Okay, your post-baby body is 1000 x better than my "never-even-thought-about-having-babies" body.
    You are smokin'

    Even though I have never posted a photo as brave as you did
    I have posted a [fully clothed] photo at my absolutely heaviest weight and it took a lot of guts for me too do that.
    So I understand that this would of been a massive undertaking for you.
    Well done!
    xo

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  11. Thank you so much, that is an excellent way of looking at it! <3

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  12. Dude... any time we really look at ourselves when we aren't totally happy takes a lot of guts. I think you're incredibly brave and incredibly beautiful, and that is the best combination I know of x

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  13. umm you look awesome! Its so weird getting used to the new body after a baby, its just about getting comfortable in your new skin.. Good on you for having the guts to post those pics! x

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  14. umm you look amazing! am totally jealous of that post baby body! 

    x jody {lemonrhodes.blogspot.com}

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  15. After four babies I've learned to love my body (mostly), I also know some ace tricks for hiding the bits I like a little less ;)

    You look amazing. And that body has grown a WHOLE OTHER PERSON! :D

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  16. A great post, and an AMAZING body, you should feel comfortable and proud of it! Wish my photos were as brave, but my husband kind of freaked when I discussed it with him, so I will be a little more covered up

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  17. Thank you for linking up! You have an amazing body Stacey.

    You deserve to be proud, every woman does.

    And just quietly, you have been so brave in sharing your story about your body image and for that, I thank you. Just as I am sure every other woman would too!

    ps. You have amazing boobs!

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  18. hee hee guts:)

    It's a new normal... I really do have to get comfortable with that x

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  19. a really, really big other person, too! Just learning all these tricks x

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  20. Lady, you are a knockout! I'm a size 10-12 who's never had kids and I WISH I looked as stunning as you in my undies.

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  21. haha a fabulous combination of breastfeeding and a good bra :)

    Thank you... I feel a mixture of fear and bravery - the story I could share no problem, but those photos were a whole other issue. But I believe so much in what you're doing, I had to go all out. Thanks so much for bringing this to everyone xx

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  22. Yep, I gave mine a heads up it would appear! I wonder how I'd feel if I were him. I can't wait to see your post, I love hearing everybody's journeys to self acceptance xx

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  23. But I wish I could write like you... wanna merge and become one?

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  24. Hi VM,

    You are a brave woman! Love the photos and what you write although I did notice there could have been more of the what you love about your body. I know that's hard though as it seems like bragging.

    I mostly love mine these days even though I'm middle aged and have spawned three kids so it's not at it's best. The sad thing is when my body was in its prime I didn't appreciate it.

    I do now:)

    PS. And being a A cup I am very jealous of your cleavage;) Did anyone mention your beautiful natural long hair?

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  25. Oh you make me laugh! You're right - I could have said more I love about my body... and I know overall I'm very fortunate. It's been a long road to self-acceptance, I was a child and teen with very little self-esteem. But I'm happy with where I'm at, and when I finally do some sit ups and tone up my thighs, I'll be even happier! Thanks for stopping by xo

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  26. Imagine if your body stopped functioning tomorrow. I think we'd all wish then that we accepted what we have and what it's capable of. BTW. You're hot VM. x

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  27. I'm trading my body for yours. ALL of it. Cmon, send it over. NOW.

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  28. I am so impressed that you have undies and a bra that matches! Looking amazing.

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  29. They don't match... they're just both black! <3

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  30. Well Ok, now that you have nice neighbours and all... ;-)

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  31. Like I said on twitter, this is an excellent comment... as usual. I heart my body and I heart what it can do. I ain't Miranda Kerr, but I'm me :)

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  32. Corrina (The Parents&#39; Jury)October 28, 2011 3:03 PM

    You look amazing and what a great campaign!

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  33. Whoa. I read this whole post thinking these shots were PRE Veggie Baby. Are you telling me that you actually look this phenomenal after having a baby??! You. Are. Amazing. xxx

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  34. Thanks girl. It's not so bad :)

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  35. I wish I knew how to paint because you would most certainly be my muse. You. Are. Beautiful. x

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  36. Wow... nobody's ever said that to me before! Takes one to know one ;-)

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  37. Stacey, I cannot tell you how beautiful you are. At least in my eyes. So pretty that I was too scared to talk to you in August! And I know that this is all about how you feel in your own eyes.
    That body? You cannot tell it has carried and nourished a child. You really cannot. And I will forever be jealous of your boobs. Serious.

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  38. I was going to link up and today I've had a body image crisis. I don't know what has brought it on, but seeing everyone else's posts start to filter through has not empowered me like it did last year. I feel ashamed and embarrassed and it annoys me that I feel that way. It annoys me more that I can't even explain why. So MASSIVE kudos to you x

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  39. You're farming hot. I heart your body too. x

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  40. Oh you silly girl, nobody is too pretty to talk to! And it's so funny because I never would think of myself like that. I thought you were beautiful, and I had massive hair envy. I didn't get boobs until I was 22, and now that I have to wear a bra every second of every day, I wonder if I would have ended up being happy with little ones :)

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  41. Oh hon, I hate that you feel that way. Because you really don't need to. Have a wine and sleep on it and see how you feel in the morning. Cos you really are smoking hot. But I totally understand xo

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  42. Your comments always make me laugh! <3

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  43. Your body is seriously beautiful. And I LOVE that tatt under your arm, what is that? I even like the butterfly on your leg, and I don't usually like tattoos there. You make me want to eat olives and cuddle cats and get a butterfly thigh tattoo too.

    Smokin' aces.

    XXOO

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  44. She is my mama owl, I will send you a picture :)

    We need to hang out more xo

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  45. I found a solution... I just put naked pictures on the internet. HOLY FUCK.

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  46. Wow! Now while I understand that your body must have changed and that takes a bit of getting used to, I just look at these photos in awe!! You are so stunning and your body is smoking hot mama!!!!  I still think you're brace for exposing yourself and baring all, but I think you should be proud of what you've accomplished in the past year and the few little stretch marks can be your battle scars-where them with pride! You grew a person-how amazing is that?!?!?!
    xoxoxoxo

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  47. You are just completely stunning!  I'm speachless - not sure that's ever happened before ...

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  48. It's amazing how much babies change our bodies!

    You look awesome-and I love your owl tatt

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  49. Veggie Habahaba Mama holy god. You are a goddess.

    That is all.

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  50. You and you sister are very blessed. Your post was the first I heart my body post i saw yesterday and it half inspired me to post, half scared me off from posting my own! You are stunning! 

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  51. AND YOU TOTALLY ROCKED IT! man... wow.

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  52. I am totally proud! But as you say, my body has changed, and because it's all new to me I'm still in the process of getting used to it. I can see things are working themselves out in their own time, and others need a little help... and some things will never be the same. And coming to terms with that is ok, because it's a decision that I made, and it just happens to be the best one. I'd suffer anything to have this little girl!

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  53. Thank you! I don't know, in my mind I must have just assumed things would bounce back. You're probably not gonna bounce back from attempting to push a stuck nine-pound baby out for two hours too quickly! Plus breastfeeding hormones. I'm pretty sure they were to blame in my feeling ugly phase. Change always takes a little getting used to :)

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  54. I'm so glad you posted, it can be very empowering. Not to mention the fabulous and wonderful support from our fellow bloggers. It can be amazing xo

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  55. Damn woman! I want to pose almost-nude with your body, please. Or maybe I'll just photoshop my head on your body. :P

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  56. Holy Crap woman! You're freaking hot!

    I didn't notice the 'spots' on your belly button at all. I don't think you look like you have a 'front bum' (though you did make me laugh) and I can't see a 'halo of fat' above your knees.

    I can see a tiny waist I'd kill for, long, slender legs and some boobs that look nothing remotely like deflated anything!

    B!tch. ;-D

    You SHOULD love that body. Forget just how wonderful you look. But can haz baby! Superpower!

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  57. dude, I would laugh my ass off if you did that! Together we could be super-mega-hot xo

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  58. by the power of breastfeeding boobs and an excellent bra! They may only be changes I can see, but I'm the only one I've got to impress.

    baby superpower is BETTAH THAN ANYTHING!

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  59. You should be proud of your body. You look amazing! :) Thank you for sharing

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  60. Isn't the disparity between what we see and what others see extraordinary? I see yours and Glowless's photos and thought how stunning and womanly and just beautiful you both look. Our bodies are amazing andy built to do great things. This idea is a wonderful way to celebrate it. Thank you for sharing x

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  61. My hair...it's fake. Shhhh!
    I got boobs for a time there at 22 too. But that was only because I was bf'ing Greenie. They went away again when I stopped. If i'm not wearing a bra i'm wearing one of those bonds maternity tops. Hoping I can somehow reverse the sag? Lol.

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  62. Isn't it a great way to celebrate womanhood and how beautiful we all are? That's why I wanted to do it. I'm sure if I'd done it last year when I was pregnant I would have felt a different way. And next year if I do it, I'm sure I'll feel different again. I love that it is a snapshot in time, and a place for me to put down what I've been thinking, even subconsciously, about my body's changes after baby. The best part of this is that people are telling me these things are normal! It's wonderful to know that we are capable of so much, and that even though our physical bodies change, we are still strong <3

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  63. LOVE this post. so glad i found you!  I
    <3 your body too, and i feel that self acceptance is the key to life...for women.  As I lay my hand oh my own front BUM, which i've had without ever having a child, i add your blog to my list and i hope you smile at this, which i wrote. http://janineonadime.blogspot.com/2010/07/barbies-eating-disorder.html

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  64. I have to agree with almost everyone here. You look fantastic, If I had a body like yours, I would be trying my best every day to love it as much as I can! Even if you can't do it every day, just take today to really love your body like I am learning to, you can take it from there!

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  65. Rhi @ Hummingbird&#39;s SongOctober 29, 2011 5:28 PM

    You look absolutely amazing, and have completely inspired me to get another tattoo. Damn, if only I had boobies like that! :P

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  66. You are absolutely beautiful. Loved reading your words. You rocked this campaign!

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  67. I think most if not all husbands would be the same. I'm 120kgs-ish and my husband tells me I'm gorgeous every single day. Because I am damnit ;)
    You are stunning Veggie Mama!

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  68. I like your comment.  "We only get one body. We have to learn to love it." Learning...  slowly.  Thanks for posting

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  69. haha thanks for stopping by! I'm off to read your post now :)

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  70. I love it, but the changes I've seen take a bit of getting used to! It still rocks though, and you're so nice to say what you have. Thanks so much :)

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  71. Thanks, I gave it my best shot!! <3

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  72. It doesn't always come easily, huh. A work in progress x

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  73. I stared at your photos for ages in awe - wow you are gorgeous :) Seriously I want your boobs just for one day, I'd just take photos of me with them, then you can have them back Ok ?? xx

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  74. Nawww, you are the sweetest xo

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  75. Oh my goodness, hats off to you - so brave! You look absolutely amazing, esp. those milk machines!! :) 

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  76. I don't know chickie, are you ready to be a ranga? :P

    Kristin Brumm
    Wanderlust





    Subject: [theveggiemama] Re: Veggie Mama: I Heart My Body. Sort Of.

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  77. sure! they're no longer mine anyway... ;-)

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  78. My milkshake brings all the babes to the yard... 

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  79. Sure, if we're gonna be hotter than Julia Gillard!

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  80. Your body is beautiful, which is good cos it matches your insides.

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  81. What a gorgeous thing to say... thank you. I appreciate it so much x

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  82. You have an AMAZING body!!!! I'd be showing it off at every opportunity!! Go Vegie Mama!

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  83. Haha we'll see what summer brings :) thank you x

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  84. Bree KatsamangosDecember 6, 2011 4:58 PM

    You look gorgeous!

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  85. Aw thank you. Still have all my hair here, that's why!

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  86. Nothing to worry about here - you're gorgeous!

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  87. u have amazing figure

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  88. Your body is Amazing

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  89. I'm 54. My body bounced back to 50 kg, size 10, after both children. I've been stressing about my body since I was 14!!!!! Believe me it has been a WASTE of time and energy. I should have been celebrating what I had.

    Focus on your good bits and get on with life. When I hear a woman moan about her body I want to scream...mmmm, I need to listen to my own advice.

    alison

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  90. Haha my body's all right! It does its job. I think I'm entitled to a bit of shock and a period of adjustment after a baby... but it's hardly stressing and it won't last forever. I'm sorry if you thought I was moaning!

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  91. Um. There is nothing horrible about this body. Even if you were a size 24, it would be beautiful. That's because it made a miracle. A baby.

    *But yours does look pretty amazing. I'd be happy with that bod ;) xx

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  92. yeah it does all right! Even though it's making me tired now growing another one :)

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  93. Sarah Jane JaramilloApril 30, 2012 7:54 AM

    I was researching young women born with strawberry birthmarks, such as myself, and how they cope with our median driven society of what is beautiful, and i stumbled upon your blog. Not quite what i was looking for but I thought, how fitting! I am a 5 weeks old mother, and going through a love and hate relationship with my body. I ballooned from a 00 size with my twin girls. Your post was a nice breath of fresh air, maybe one day, I'll be as gutsy to photograph my post-pregnancy body.

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  94. You never know! I never really got back to "normal" before I fell pregnant again, so I'm interested to see what two close pregnancies does to my body. I may not be so brave after that! I like the sound of your research, it sounds so interesting. And congrats on the little one!

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  95. I would KILL to have your body :( I'm 27, and have a 6 year old and a 1 year old.  I am 5'6" and weigh 163 lbs.  I weighed 145 in high school.  I carry my weight in my hips, thighs, and butt and I hate summer because it's shorts season.  You think your thighs are jiggly?  You should see mine!!  I so wish that I looked like you :'(

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  96. Aw shorts season sucks when we feel a bit wobbly :( I think it's because I'm so tall that everything sort of just stretches out! One year after baby is still normal to be carrying extra weight. I hope you feel better soon though xx

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  97. I was doing the same, but gender neutral. I'm wondering if I'm the only person in the world with a birth mark that really looks like a strawberry in shape and size (but is brown in color), and is attractive (it's a source of facination for anyone who sees it). Mine is descrete and only visible if I choose - it's on my knee. Where is your's and what does it look like? Do you have any spiritual, philosophical, bilogical or theological views as to why you have it?
    Tom ([email protected])

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  98. Such an interesting thought! I hope you get what you're looking for.

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  99. Was doing some general research (different goal to Sarah) as you do after a few too many on a w/e :)  My choice of words could have been better.

    Seems I'm the only male to add to this site!? Need to get back into the gym and stop getting in touch with my feminine side (lol).

    Oh and by the way, I agree with the rest of the chicks (appropriate male response)  on this site ;)

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  100. ha yeah I need some more guys reading vegetarian recipes!

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